Coming home

After not being able to see you last weekend  I have been a big ole bundle of nerves and now you tell me you are coming home again and to buy a ticket!  My nerves are shot mister! LOL  But I would not trade this for anything in the world. I think about how easy this would have been if we were living together and sometimes it makes me grow impatient but knowing the progress we have made makes it ok and I love you just the same!

Day 82?

It's been soooo long since I have written a post here and that is only because we seem to talk frequently and my strength is growing daily to the point that I don't need to always enmesh myself in some sort of connection that makes me cognizant of my dedication to you- There is not forgetting now.   I love you more with each moment and I am still feeling like I am looking from the outside in because it'  so surreal to me that this is slowly happening with you and I. We are planning a future really, and it's wonderful!  I love you my King. I cannot wait to see you and I am praying from now until next week that this flight home is going to happen and we are going to be in each other's arms really soon!

Day 61

2 months down my love!  Hopefully only one more to go!  I have to say it has not been bad. Not at all!   I have been more than happy to wait on my King to come home. It is going to  be one grand reunion my love. I cannot wait!  Mucho, mucho love to you!  

Day 54,55,56!

Sometimes I can't keep up, and this is a rare instance.   I feel like I am somehow creating a disservice by not writing an entry every day, but I still remain focused on supporting you in every way possible, it's just sometimes things get in the way. Mainly, PMS!  I'm bloated, irritable, and waiting on my doctor's appointment Tuesday. A little nervous, because I don't want to go through what I went through before, alone.  Praying that my pains are nothing but pains. No cause would be great!

Isabella and I enjoy our weekend.  Olivia's birthday party where she busted the pinata. We watched the Dolphin Tale movie accompanied with some nachos and cheese, and then went to Olive  Garden where we pigged out! After that we went to Target and she got a new school skirt and some cute knee high  socks for the cooler weather.

We love you so much soldier, and await your return. We are behind you all the way!

Day 52 and 53

I'm sad, I want to hear from you and know that you are okay and in one piece. My fears grow when I don't hear from you. I suppose it's natural to fear losing someone  all the time. Especially in your line of work.

 There is hardly a moment that  goes by that you are not on my mind. I'm serious. You affect every aspect of my life and always present in my decision making. We have got some fun to be had in the future, my love. Holding on with all my might! xoxo

I love you more than I love me; please always remember that.

A

Day 50 and 51

Happy 50th baby!  LOL 50 days down and another day closer to you coming home.

I worry when I read the news. I don't know if you are still in Iraq or moved on to Afghanistan but I just read a story of an American being killed at the embassy in Kabul. What if it's you?  I have not heard from you since Friday and won't feel better until I hear from you again. Your work is so dangerous sweetheart, I can't imagine having death upon me every second of the day.  It kills me to know you go through this every day but I keep telling myself no news is good news.  Still though, waiting to hear from you love. Until then, praying hard.

XOXO

Day 49

When you love real, real loves comes back to you.

Nothing truer baby.  When real loves kills superficiality, a whole new world emerges.  You start caring for another more than yourself, you start looking for ways to make the other one happy, or to do things to lessen their fears and grief.  You want to be on the upside of things for them when  they are down. You just want to do everything you can they way they want.

Loving you honestly, has allowed me to see myself from a different perspective.  I see my faults but instead of getting mad at them  I want to correct them and improve for me, for us, for the kids. I am working on me and accomplishing things daily. Thank you for being not only my rock, but my stepping stone.

Watching a boatload of ArmyWives episodes tonight and awaiting Isabella to come home tomorrow. I have been treating myself to a relaxing day and will worry about housework tomorrow!

I love you soldier and thank you for YOU.